The Marauder Reconstruction
by ienjoybooks
Summary: AU: Sirius was the Potter's secretkeeper when he was kidnapped by some Death Eaters. Despite being tortured relentlessly, he never gave up the information. Now Voldemort is defeated, Sirius is in St. Mungo's and he may never recover from the affects of his torture. James and Remus attempt to help him heal, and they all discover things about their friendship they never expected.


**A/N: This will be a chapter story. This first chapter is subject to edits. I just wanted to get this first one out so that I could start getting some feedback. Thanks for reading, and prepare to have your heart broken… in a good way. :D **

_Pain, excruciating pain, is all that registered in his brain at first. His head felt like it had been bashed in with a steel mallet and all of his bones ached horribly. He tried to open his eyes, but for some reason he couldn't. He tried again, but his eyelids didn't seem to want to respond, so now he tried moving other parts of his body, all to no avail. He tried multiple times but he couldn't so much as wiggle a finger. He began to panic; he couldn't seem to remember what had happened to him or where he was. Had he died? A million thoughts began to swirl violently inside his head, and for a moment he was sure he'd pass out from the panic when he heard a few hushed voices nearing him. He tried hard to listen._

"I have correctly identified this as him but I want you to be prepared for what you will see," said Dumbledore softly. "It isn't a pretty sight, he is in really bad shape." James nodded as Dumbledore finally let him pass and walk up to a bed in the middle of the room. James was startled as he looked down at the figure in the bed. It certainly was his best friend but he looked so much different now. His face, neck, and arms where covered in a large number of harsh, black and purple bruises and his long hair hung limply from his head, no longer voluminous and full of life. He was covered with a thin hospital blanket and had tubes in his nose and arms. James hadn't realized that his jaw had dropped until he felt a gentle hand lay on his shoulder, he didn't need to look up to know that it was Dumbledore's hand. James felt tears prick in his eyes as he looked upon his brother lying so still, so damaged, looking so… fragile. James swallowed hard as he turned to the healer. "What exactly happened? What are his injuries?" James asked, half wanting to know and half not sure if he could handle the details. "The list is long, I'm afraid," began the Healer as she led James over to a couch against the wall where she had James sit beside her. "He suffered many broken bones including two broken arms, two broken legs, multiple broken and fractured ribs, and a broken collar bone. We have healed all of the broken bones. He also suffered from some internal bleeding which we have also repaired, though we have to keep an eye on that. Unfortunately, those are the only injuries we can repair. It seems that Mr. Black was subjected to hours and hours of the Cruciatis Curse and after a prolonged exposure, there can be permanent damage."

_Everything suddenly came rushing back to him. He had been riding home on his motorbike and when some Death Eaters had ambushed him. They had kidnapped him and tortured him for information about where the Potter's were in hiding, they tortured him for days and eventually he passed out from the pain. He had no recollection of how he got to the hospital, he must have been found by some members of the Order. But why was James here? Didn't he know it was dangerous; his son was the most wanted person by Voldemort. He tried hard to open his mouth to tell him this but he still couldn't seem to make his body respond to his command._

James's head had seemed to go fuzzy as he tried to comprehend everything being told to him. "P-permanent damage?" James stuttered. "Like what kind of damage?" The healer looked grave as she looked up at James again. "Brain damage. He is in a coma now, and when or if he ever wakes up, he may have severe mental impairment. Only time can really tell." This last bit of information was almost too much for James to handle and the tears he had been fighting against so valiantly finally spilled over onto his cheeks. The healer laid a gentle hand on James's shoulder. "That's some best friend you've got Mr. Potter. As I understand they were torturing him for information as to you and your family's whereabouts?" James nodded numbly at this question. "Well, seeing his injuries and what he endured, he must really care about you to not have divulged your whereabouts." James hung his head sadly, the tears flowing freely now. "I know how great he is, he might as well be my brother. I just can't help but think it is all so unfair. Voldemort is defeated, and my family is safe but now here he is, in the hospital, I feel like it is my fault by extension..."

_Voldemort was defeated? He felt incredibly elated at this news, James, Lily, and most importantly, Harry were now safe. As he listened to James talk about it he felt an incredible wave of sadness as he realized the reason that he couldn't move was because his body was in a coma. Hearing his best friend cry over him, worried that it was his fault he was now in this position, was almost too much to handle. He wished he could just open his eyes and let James know that he could hear him and that he was there and that there was nothing to feel guilty about._

James got up and walked toward his best friend's bedside, he looked at him for a minute as he tried to comprehend the gravity of the situation. James wanted to hold his hand or lay a hand on his shoulder, but he felt a little afraid to touch him. There were so many tubes that he didn't recognize going into his body. The healer had come up to the other side of the bed, and obviously noticing James hesitance she looked at him kindly, "It's ok, you can hold his hand, and it won't hurt him. All of his physical injuries are healed," said the healer sweetly. James nodded weakly and pulled up a chair beside the bed and sat down, taking his brother's hand in his. James looked up to the healer now. "Can… can he hear me?" James asked, unsure if this was stupid question or not. The healer smiled a little as she answered, "Well, we cannot know for sure if he can hear you but sometimes individuals in comas can hear their surroundings. It actually might do him some good, if you spoke to him. Sometimes hearing loved ones voices and feeling their touch will draw somebody out of their coma." James looked a little more hopeful as he clutched his best friend's hand a bit tighter. The healer smiled again before she departed the room, followed by Dumbledore the two left without a room, leaving the two men by theirselves.

"Hey Padfoot," James began slowly. "Thanks for keeping us safe, mate. I owe you my life."

"_James, it was nothing. You're my best friend and I know you would have done the same for me." Sirius wished he could say this aloud so that James could hear._

James's finger had begun to rub circles on the back of Sirius's hand as he spoke once more, "I don't know if you can hear me, but I'm going to talk to you regardless… Mate, you look awful, I hope you aren't in any pain…"

"_I can hear you Prongs. I'm listening to you," Sirius began to feel a pang of hopelessness now. "I wish I could just tell you how much pain I'm in, it is excruciating, James. The only thing helping me is that you're here now."_

He was still rubbing Sirius's hand as his tears began to fall and drop on Sirius's bruised arm, "I'm really worried about you, buddy. This is difficult; Remus and I have been worried sick about you for a while now. I'm glad we've found you but it's like only finding the shell of you. You aren't smiling, or laughing and now your face looks so solemn, it's just not you."

"_Please don't cry. I am okay. I will be okay, Prongs. I wish I could smile and laugh with you and Remus again too, I'm so lonely, James," Sirius wanted so badly to cry right now too but he couldn't even manage that._

James began to laugh softly as he held Sirius's hand tightly. "If you can hear me, I probably sound like a total sap. I hope you don't mind me holding your hand," James paused as he wiped some of his tears away. "It seems to be all that I'm able to do. The healer told me that the physical contact and the sound of my voice might help you… I sure hope it's helping Padfoot."

_Sirius laughed mentally too, "It's ok to be a total sap sometimes. Please don't let go of my hand, it makes me feel less alone and afraid. James I'm so scared, I wish I could just open my eyes, or just squeeze your hand so that you know I'm listening."_

"Please, Sirius. Please, if you can hear me, just let me know. Just squeeze my hand or something. I just want to know that my brother is here with me." James now began to smooth out Sirius's hair, hoping that if he was aware that he would feel comforted.

_Sirius tried harder than ever to squeeze James's hand but it was a futile attempt, he was just too deep in his coma. "James, I can hear you. I'm trying to squeeze your hand but I just can't do it. I would do it if I could, honestly."_

James sat for nearly two hours talking to Sirius's motionless body, lying in front of him, hoping that somehow his best friend was listening. It was starting to get late and he realized that he should probably get home to Lily.

"I've got to get home to Lily and Harry, Padfoot. I'll come back tomorrow to see you." James now took Sirius's hand in both of his and gave it a firm squeeze.

_Sirius began to feel panicked again as he mentally pleaded with his best friend, "Please James, just stay a little longer I don't want to be alone. I'm in so much pain… it hurts so much. I want you to stay so that I'm not scared."_

"Moony will be here later to see you," said James in a tone so reassuring that it was almost as if he had heard Sirius pleading with him.

_Sirius took a small mental sigh of relief, "Please tell him to hurry James, I don't want to be alone. I'm so scared..."_

James began to walk toward the door when he suddenly turned back to Sirius, taking hold of his hand again. "You know, Harry is asking for you all the time. Maybe I'll bring him along sometime soon so that he can see you, I know he misses you terribly."

_Sirius felt his heart lift a bit at this, "Please bring him soon. I want to see him so badly. Please tell Harry that I'm here, that I haven't left him. Tell him that I miss him too."_

James now squeezed Sirius's hand again and as he spoke, he laid his other hand on his shoulder, "See you later, mate. Please get better, ok? I need you. I love you."

_Sirius was shocked, he and James knew they each loved the other like a flesh-and-blood brother but they rarely said it aloud. "I'm trying to get better James, please hurry back. I love you too."_

After looking at Sirius once more James turned and slowly left the room, trying to clear up his tears. This was the most broken that James had ever felt in his entire life, and he feared for his best friend.


End file.
